For once in “Open Post” animal battle history, the two competitors seem almost evenly matched. YouTube channel CatersClips brings us the epic battle between Pebbles the brave kid goat and Henny Penny the ornery chicken. This all went down on their owner James Vander Meide’s vineyard in McMinnville, Oregon. Pebbles has the four legs and teeth advantage, but Henny makes up for it in sheer viciousness accompanied by a razor-sharp beak. Henny doesn’t care that Pebbles has multiple limbs with which to trample her. The only thing madder than a wet hen is a dry one that’s been challenged by some uppity goat.
Can you guess the victor of this latest war-torn barnyard battle?
Rising up on her hind legs, Pebbles tries to intimidate the poultry pest but is ultimately chased off.
Whoever wrote that YouTube caption better watch their ass. Henny Penny isn’t going to like some stupid human describing her as a “pest.” They’re going to close their laptop some night and, in horror movie fashion, Henny is going to have been crouched there behind it on the table ready to beak them to death.
Finally, an end appears to be in sight to the slo-mo car crash that has been our view into Heather Locklear‘s past year. If what TMZ reports is true, hopefully Heather, one of our Patron Saints of 1980s glamour vixens attached to sexy-sleazy rock stars (I’m also looking at you, Valerie Bertinelli), will soon be moving from what the Daily Mail says was a psychiatric hold at UCLA Medical Center into a long term facility. Continue reading
Page Six reports that recent Beyhive favorite Madonna and her legal team were told to cut the shit regarding her recent efforts to obtain records from the neighbors in her Upper West Side co-op in NYC. From that post title, you probably assumed the neighbors were bitching in a courtroom about all of the bulldozer, jackhammer, and iceberg cracking sounds coming from Madge’s place during her morning beauty ritual. But no, it’s some legal stuff.
I came of age on the social fringes of the gutter punks and squatters who viewed catching a little case of the bed bugs (or scabies or crabs, for that matter) as a crusty rite of passage. They would be raising a brown bag of Mickey’s 40 OZ to Brazilian model Sabrina Jales St. Pierre whom People announced is suing Palm Desert Embassy Suites for allegedly giving her a bad case of the skin nibbles caused by bed bugs. Try to get through this story without itching and you win a gold star.
If you’re picturing ultra-twink Tom Daley suddenly sporting chest hair, a harness, and smoking a cigar, you’ve entered my deepest fantasies! I kid. Tom, 24, and his husband, Dustin Lance Black, 44, announced on Instagram that they are the proud papas of a new baby son! Hopefully, Tom’s hanging in there. If he was as traumatized as he looked by an ultrasound pic, one can only imagine the terror he’s experiencing with a real-life howling responsibility machine.
Some lucky laboratory (or a producer on The Maury Show) is about to receive a semen sample with an easy-breezy drawl, a golden shag of California sun-kissed hair, and a suspiciously familiar broke dick nose. Hell, they won’t even have to do the test. UsWeekly reports that Owen Wilson is making his jizz available to determine if he’s a father for the third time. Continue reading